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Happiness

How to Live ON PURPOSE and Maximize Every Freaking Day

Today can be as great as you want it to be.

Your fate isn’t set. You get to decide how much of yourself you’re going to put into today.

Rather than saying, “Well, we’ll see what happens,” you must powerfully state, “Today, I’m going to make it happen!”

When you go into the gym, you get to decide how hard you’re going to work out. But one thing is for certain, you’ll feel far better if you walk out 30–60 minutes later having given it everything you’ve got.

The same goes with your day.

It’s actually far more exhausting to not work than it is to work. It takes far more energy sitting with internal conflict and justification than it does to just get to work. Said Steven Pressfield, “Most of us have two lives: the life we liveand the un-lived life within us. Between the two stands resistance.”

If your life feels out-of-whack or out-of-balance, you’re likely avoiding the very thing you should be doing. It’s only in doing that thing that you’ll regain balance and peace. Avoidance leads to busyness and distraction.

The Invisible Difference When You Fully Live

When I give everything I’ve got at work, I’m a different person. I’m happier. The world is a more beautiful and abundant place. Other people smile at me as I walk past them and I have no idea why.

Seriously.

On days I’ve actually done what I intended to do, it seems like more people look me in the eyes and smile at me as I walk past them. And I’m certain I’m not initiating those smiles. Yet when I receive one of those smiles, I look at that person for a few moments after they’ve looked away from me. I feel love toward them and wish them happiness in their lives.

Moreover, on days I’ve actually lived my purpose, I leave my work more energized than before I started. When I walk through my front door, my kids often run up and hug me, and ask me to play with them. As I look at them in such moments, I see only perfection. Love fills my heart and I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude and humility for my life. To adapt a quote from Goethe, “The way you see [a child] is the way you treat them and the way you treat them is [who] they [will] become.”

Conversely, on days I’ve spent my working time in distraction and self-sabotage, I come home feeling like a fraud. My family still loves me all the same. Yet, it’s so much harder for me to give them the attention and love they deserve and need. On wasted and un-lived days, I end up sucking more energy from those around me than I emit. I see only the problems in my children and am highly irritable.

You can’t see the energy-field around you, but it’s there.

You Can Make the Shift

I know what it feels like being stuck and without momentum.

You can feel absolutely powerless to change your life and circumstances.

But that’s a complete lie.

It’s garbage.

I know it feels more real than anything else.

But it’s not.

Feeling guilty about all the time you’ve wasted won’t help.

If you make a few tweaks to your approach, you’ll be surprised at how quickly your perception of the world and yourself will change. As your perception changes, everything around you will change.

Start small.

Give one or two of these a try and watch what happens:

1. Have a weekly reflection and planning session

“The game is won or lost before it begins.” — John Wooden

One day per week (my preference is Sunday), take 10–30 minutes reflecting on your past six days. How did they go?

Try asking yourself the following questions:

· Who did I not meet this week that I should have?

· What did I not do?

· What did I miss?

· What should I tighten up?

Getting down on yourself isn’t the purpose. Rather, being aware of how you’re doing is the purpose. Awareness facilitates empowerment to change.

After assessing your previous week, make better plans for the next six days. Then, in six more days, do it again.

This need not take long, but it can dramatically improve the quality of your weeks and the days within those weeks.

2. Weekly goals > Daily to-do’s

“Most people overestimate what they can do in a day, and underestimate what they can do in a month. We overestimate what we can do in a year, and underestimate what we can accomplish in a decade.” — Matthew Kelly

The more mature you get about your time and results, the less you view things in isolation. In reality, it’s quite easy to have one good day. It’s harder to have a good week, a good month, or a good year.

Yet, most people prefer thinking in shorter time intervals. Why? Because most people lack the confidence to go big. They prefer the dopamine boost of getting lots done, even if they aren’t making any progress.

Thus, most people focus on quantity over quality. They’d rather write 5 mediocre blogs in one week than 1 or 2 really good ones. They’d rather have 5 or 6 mediocre workouts than a few that actually build their long-term strength or endurance.

However, the only way to make big progress is to think in longer intervals. You’re far better off trying something awesome over a week than just chipping away day-by-day. Swing for the fences. Take risks. Go big.

Every week, you should be trying to do something you’ve never done before. You should be elevating your game. It shouldn’t look the same as last week. Hence, the weekly planning sessions. What are you going to strive for this week that will change the game for you?

Are you experimenting, or just going through the motions?

Are you courageously embracing fear and risk?

Are you humbly embracing further education?

If not, you’re plateau’d. And in many ways, it doesn’t really matter what you do with your days. You could do the same thing every day and not get any better.

3. Three month energy cycles

When it comes to your future, you have three vantage points.

· Your vision (your WHY) = 10–25 years’ out

· Your long-term goals (AKA your wild guess) = 36 months’ out

· Your actual goals (AKA your realistic game plan) = the next 90 days

In the 20th century, it was a solid practice to have five year goals. Things were more stable back then. Today, things are changing too abruptly to realistically determine where you’ll be in five years.

Framing your goals in three month increments gives you a clear and realistic future to sprint toward. Of course, these goals are based on your longer-term goals. However, your 3-month goal cycles are your main focus.

Just like your weekly planning sessions, every three months spend a few hours or even a full day reflecting on your previous three months. Make any adjustments you need and make better plans for the next three months.

4. Organize yourself

“Happiness lies in the cultivation of the garden.” — Voltaire

Your life is a garden, cultivate it.

Organize yourself. Clean out the weeds. It doesn’t matter how long it takes. The very act of cultivating your garden will enliven you. You’ll never be finished. But every day, week, and year, you can make your garden a little more beautiful and fruitful.

Clean up your finances.

Clean up how you use your time.

Clean up your relationships.

Cultivate.

Just a little bit every day. Once you start to get things organized, the soil of your life will be better suited for what you plant in it.

5. Always choose the harder right or “higher road”

Perfection is not the goal. However, consistently making better choices is the only way to get momentum. And momentum is exactly what you need. If you’re stuck, momentum is working against you.

It takes some work pumping the water-well to get it going. But it’s worth it.And it really only takes one great day to get it moving.

You are one great day away from having a breakthrough. Steven Pressfield tells of “resisting” what he wanted to do for years. Then one day, he forced himself to write. He threw everything in the garbage he wrote that day. None of it was any good. But when he walked away from that work session to clean a pile of dishes sitting in the sink, he felt changed. “The water felt warm,” he said. He knew that he had just had a breakthrough.

That’s all you need.

Don’t worry about the output when you’re trying to build momentum. Instead, just get yourself to do whatever you feel you need to do.

Regardless of how you feel during the experience, you will feel hope and optimism when you’re done.

You can get to the point where you consciously make solid choices in every situation you’re in.

Consistency = confidence.

Consistency = momentum.

Conclusion

When you woke up today, how did you feel today was going to go?

I challenge you to wake up tomorrow with this feeling, “Today can be as great as I want it to be.”

Having that feeling won’t come out of nowhere. You’ll need to set yourself up to have that feeling. However, setting yourself up isn’t all that hard. It may be as simple as spending 2 minutes the night before writing a plan. It may be spending 15 minutes the Sunday before making a plan.

Whatever it is, you have a reason to live your life to the fullest. You may not know exactly what that reason is, but you’ll find it once you get moving. More than likely, you’ll realize that everything in your life is actually far more beautiful that you could previously perceive.

From this level of joy and purpose, you’ll be empowered to consciously create a future you are worthy of.

Originally posted at ThriveGoal by Benjamin P.Hardy: https://journal.thriveglobal.com/how-to-live-on-purpose-and-maximize-every-freaking-day-f89e43950e74#.rvfz49blg

Men’s guidelines to end their girlfriends Valentine’s Day in seventh heaven

 

 

No more than two weeks before Saint Valentine’s Day. Some men already have plans how to make that day unforgettable and special (at least for them) and also there were some who until now clueless of how are they going to celebrate this so-called lover’s day (because people usually celebrate it with their partner) with their girlfriends. Just in case, you’re one of those men who haven’t planned anything yet this guidelines to wrap-up her Valentine’s will, I think, help you figure out what would be the perfect date or To-do for your girlfriend consider the coming Valentine’s day UNFORGETTABLE.

 

So here it goes.

 

First of all, we both know there are different types of women in this world: the chic, the geeky-woman, the one-of the-boys, the conservative type…just to name a few. If you’re following my site, you are probably familiar with my blog “What other people think on a boyish chic?” from there, I mention the types of women not to mention the blog really focus only to what are those boyish chic. Who are they, what they do and what they feel towards people who bad-mouthed them due to misinterpretations. https://thestrayrussianblue.wordpress.com/2016/01/15/what-other-people-think-on-a-boyish-chic/

date1

  •  Walking, strolling on a park enjoying the beautiful and captivating scenery of nature around you would be the perfect Valentine’s date for your nature-lover girlfriend. Simply because this type of women appreciate the beauty of her surroundings just as how she appreciates your presence. If you’re going to ask me between day and night of roaming around the park, I prefer during the night not only because I am not used to bunch of people but also because I do not like the brightness of sun.

for movie watching cinemas.png

  • Watch all the hot and trending showing movies in cinemas talk about Fifty shades Darker, everybody’s waiting for that controversial movie and surely you’re movie enthusiast girlfriend will enjoy it, knows all the movies to watch on that day and if you’re lucky, she’ll be the one to choose it for you and you’ll never have to worry choosing which of them she’ll like.

Want some suggestions? John Wick, The Space Between Us, Havenhurst, The Lego Batman, The Great Wall…

date3

  • A day of food-trip. Oh yes! Food! , says your foodie girlfriend. It is not that she’s a glutton maybe she just adores food that much. Obviously, a date with all the food that you’ve been longing to taste around you is the best Valentine’s date ever for a food-lover lady. Surely you won’t be surprise if you get yourself broke just for a day. It’s good to have back-ups, right?

date4

  • Valentine’s Day filled with extreme adventures is what your fearless and outgoing girlfriend would definitely enjoy. Let her try the next levels of zip lines, bungee jumping, sky diving or maybe go hiking as well, end your date night pampering yourselves on a spa to relax.  Why not try the wine bath at Aire Ancient Baths in New York City (I just saw this featured on Insider travel)

Couple browsing in a bookstore in Prenzlauer Berg in Berlin Germany. Image shot 08/2009. Exact date unknown.

  • A stroll to book museums bounded by collections of classics and modern books, miniatures and exhibits matches your geek and artistic girlfriend who appreciates arts and literature of all ages. It doesn’t matter if you do not feel the same (because I could sense a little violent reaction from men out there) by just keeping yourself occupied through exploring the place, checking out the pieces would surely eliminate your mind from being uninterested to the place. Look at your girl; if she enjoys it, aren’t you supposed to feel the same? Don’t forget to buy her a new book before the date ends!

date-for-gaming-couple

  • Stay-cation: movie marathon, games enjoying your Xbox or Playstation, eating whatever you both feels to buy, a simple and gamer girlfriend will surely mark the coming Valentine’s day fun and already special most especially if you let her win in all the games that you’re going to play. (Silly.) But seriously, gamers love to play all the games it doesn’t even matter if it decades old if it is still fun to play, they will play it. So if you wanted to make your girl exuberant and glad make sure to buy a new game earlier by now, you never know how much it’ll surprise her especially if you get to buy those that would squeeze her enthusiasm so much.

 

And lastly,

make up.jpg

 

  • A collection of new make-up kits: lippies, the limited edition mascara or whatsoever, the widespread black mask that could remove her white heads… etc. will absolutely make your beauty-conscious girlfriend’s heart leaps. She takes care of her looks very much that she always wanted to look good in front of you. So when the time that you’ll buy her those that I’ve mentioned, she will probably thinks you appreciate her effort for that and I surely think you guys really do.

 

There you go the guidelines in making your girl perfectly fine this coming Valentine’s Day. I hope you get to take ideas from it if not, then you’re completely in trouble because YOU ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME TO PREPARE!

I always love this quotation saying that once a person loves you, all the imperfections of him/her will all become beautiful. At the end of day, no matter how much time you consumed or the efforts that you exerts just to make that day special, little or not, your girl will surely appreciate it because it’s you who made it. I’m pretty sure she’ll do the same effort to make you happy on that day. Just appreciate her as well.

 

Good luck!

In 2017, Say Hello To Happiness — Thought Catalog

Seth Doyle Maybe you were just looking in all the wrong places. Maybe you forgot about finding happiness in the small things. Maybe you forgot how blissfully calming that first sip of tea in the chilly mornings could be. Or how perfectly cozy you felt curled up and sleepy under your soft, warm quilt. Or the smell…

via In 2017, Say Hello To Happiness — Thought Catalog

In Art of Practicality, The Purpose Of Life Is Not Happiness: It’s Usefulness

I have to agree with this. We often conclude that the purpose of life is to be happy in fact, it was Aristotle who depicted that values to us. Despite of this particular quote, we have forgotten to scrutinize it in a way that people will not have misinterpretations on the idea of happiness. We forgot to think that in able for someone to be happy is first to be appreciated in such ways that he/she will be satisfied. So, satisfied with what?

Check this out. https://medium.com/art-of-practicality/the-purpose-of-life-is-not-happiness-its-usefulness-65064d0cdd59#.jno41bxqo credits to Darius Foroux, Author of Massive Life Success, and founder of@ProcrastZero.

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