(Note: This review contains spoilers.)

A story of two young people battling with the same tormenting mental disorder, depression,  Aysel, a 16 year old physics nerd who has been very eager plotting her own death found a courageous way to fulfill her objective thru a website called Suicide Partners in which she has found her suicide buddy, FrozenRobot.

FrozenRobot, Roman is also struggling on the same illness; they were both in the midst of sadness and emptiness. Roman blames himself as the reason why her younger sister has died. So to pay for his guilt he wanted to kill himself on April 7, her sister’s death anniversary.

Thus, Aysel decided to choose FrozenRobot to do her suicide with, although for her the name “frozen robot” sounds like a flake. They decided to meet up to get to know each other and to begin their plan as well.

The two has unveiled both their secrets. They were able to know each other’s family (though Roman, only met Georgia, Aysel’s half sister), Aysel got close with Roman’s parents gaining their full-trust in order for Roman to be able to get away on April 7 because Roman has history of emotional instability due to her sister’s death which is why his parents were warned to keep an eye on him, not letting him go anywhere by himself. Thanks to Aysel, he did it now; he can now plan his death without his parents worrying without him out of their sight.

for book review
Photo credits to a.arcillas

As their suicide day is coming, Aysel realized that she is turning into a flake, backing out of their plan to die. She has come to realize that there is more to life that living life only depends on people’s perception. In the midst of her plan to change Roman’s mind, she wanted to meet her father who has been detained in jail and was transferred to a mental hospital to apologize not being by his side when the incident has happened. Aysel knows her father to be hot-headed, not being able to control his madness, this made her got afraid that she might also have the traits of being insane. She was afraid that soon she’ll be like her father who killed Timothy Jackson, a supposed to be Olympic athlete to represent Langston. The news spread like a virus that everyone in their town knows what her father did. It was the reason why her friends began to stay away from her, resulting for her to just shut everyone out of her life, her remaining friend even family. It was the reason why she wanted to end her life at such an early age.

In the long run, Aysel has come to finally change her mind, she believes that her perception changed because of knowing Roman and probably by falling in love with him, she firmly believes that it was Roman who saved her life that led her to pledge she wouldn’t let Roman die on their planned day or if he did, she would probably wouldn’t let him die alone.

“You are resilient”, Roman said to Aysel. This is the part when Roman realized that Aysel deserves to live, that Aysel could change her life and be happy for the rest of her life. Roman decided to take his own life alone. It was only a day before her sister’s death anniversary when he attempted to kill himself. He’s probably dead by now if Aysel came too late. Roman was sent to hospital the moment Aysel and his mother saw him unconscious inside the car.

In the end, Aysel confessed her love for Roman and they both found hope to live on.

NOTABLE PASSAGES:

  • Anyone who has actually been that sad can tell you that there’s nothing beautiful or literary or mysterious about depression.
  • Liking things is dangerous.
  • We all want to believe that every day is different, that every day we change, but really, it seems that certain things are coded into us from the very beginning.
  • But now I draw because sometimes it feels impossible to talk. It’s like I’m trapped in this deep hole that I can’t get out of. I draw to try to escape it, even though I know I’ll never be able to.
  • Everything in life is about the perception of the observer.
  • Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity.
  • …and frankly, the frustrating thing about love. Things that matter to the other person start to seem intriguing, even if they are actually trite when you really think about them.
  • I wonder if that’s how darkness wins, by convincing us to trap it inside ourselves, instead of emptying it out. I don’t want it to win.

WHAT I LOVED ABOUT THE BOOK…

I honestly love everything on this book. I love the threaded-patch cover of this book, its simplicity, how well it was written and most especially, I love the message of this book. True to fact, depression is an agonizing mental disorder, which makes a person suffering kill himself physically to stop the pain mentally and emotionally. It makes an individual feel empty on the inside. I have become interested with this book because I was once into this state, that I thought the only answer to all this thing running in my head, all this things that I feel is to simply end everything and just shut down myself. Until one day, I realized that I am so unfair to the people that I will be leaving. Under those circumstances, this book reminds me of myself letting go of any pessimistic thoughts, changing my perception on living this life.

 

DO I WANT TO SEE THIS ON BIG-SCREEN?

Big YES! My heart and other black holes deserve to be on big-screen because it raises awareness for people to understand a person suffering with depression.  According to Jasmine Warga, the road to recovery is long and ongoing, that in many cases, the battle with depression is a lifelong one. Her book, my heart and other black holes depicts the story of every people dealing with same emptying battle: loneliness, sadness, and self-doubt—depression.  Your closest friend may be struggling through it but you just don’t recognize them because depression may happen to even the most cheerful person in your life, they just don’t want to open up because of what? Afraid to be judge, not used to talk a lot or worse, they think it’ll just pass-by and everything’s going to be normal again. No, they need help.

 

WILL I RECOMMEND THIS BOOK TO ALL AGES?

Yes, definitely.. Children under 10 to 16 years old must be under supervision while reading this because there are some parts of this book that are not suitable for them.

RATING: 5 stars for the concept, 5 stars for cover, 4 stars on the flow of the story.

 

This is originally posted on goodreads.com/@AlphaJuliet43

Advertisements